i stared out at the sky last night--an explosion of pink clouds intensifying to magenta and then fading into the san francisco skyline. my mind was already awash in fantasy, drawing a storyboard for my future, checking the timeline, plotting the map and those fantasies mixed with my history, a river of memories and feelings flowing through the moment i was in--red broom in my hand, staring out at the sky, the feeling of her nearness surrounding me--and back out to the future of my imagination, the unknown ahead of me.

it was akin to the sunday evenings of my childhood, the end of a good day's work, the satisfaction of washed windows and folded laundry and bookshelves freed from dust. it was time to be alone with my thoughts, to meditate on my life and also to be with her, together in our solitary tasks and sharing the reward of a cold drink and some quiet time to talk and enjoy the balmy night, creatures stirring around us and a quick hello to friends.

and when my head hits my pillow for sleep at night, when she's beside me as i slip into my subconscious, i am in my present life, living the fantasy, wrapped up in the arms of a dream, wrapped around a girl.

August 24, 2001