They've issued the warnings.

They've taken back the warnings.

They've said the threat is real, but not to worry, there's no corroborating evidence for the FBI warning.

And in all the hedging of bets and speculation and conjecturing, people here are still worrying about the bridges.

The other day, driving across the bay bridge, I had this completely visceral reaction. Passing over on the lower deck, I could actually feel the bridge crumbling down on me, my jaw crumpling up like an aluminum can. Last night, coming back to the city, I contemplated the possibility of my sister and I being on the bridge at the same time, hoping at least one of us would make it over.

It's not as bad as it seems. I'm not completely freaking out and really, my anxiety level coming over the bridges is relatively small. But these images pop into my head and what's most disturbing is that they're starting to feel commonplace. As if it's not out of the ordinary at all to think about death and distruction at any given moment in the day.

I'm not the only one either. Friday morning, on my way into work, I overheard two different people airing their feelings.

"I wonder if anyone is singing on the bridges," one of them pondered.

"I know, I have to cross the Bay Bridge right now," the other worried.

November 5, 2001